Less than a month to go now! Hasn’t she always wanted a mobile phone screen that doubles as a mirror? And can he do without a mobile charm in the shape of a poodle? Can you afford not to check out our guide to the crazy world of cheap mobile phone 
accessories!
The Synch. Exciting gadget that lets you charge multiple portable devices at once. Phones, iPods, PSPs charged from the wall, the car or the laptop! Verdict – Pretty handy.
Designer Bling Crystals. Cut-out sticky pads to bling up your mobile! Verdict – No.
Bluetooth Dongle. Bluetooth connectivity device for the computer so 
you can transfer files from your 
phone. Verdict – Silly name, useful product.
Sim Card backup. Copy your contacts so you never lose your numbers! Verdict – Very sensible, get one for your dad.
Dashboard non-slip mat. Place your phone on the mat and it’ll glue to the dashboard while you drive! Verdict - Practical, but not cool.
Mobile Phone Charm Poodle - Personalise your phone with a small pink dog. Verdict – another good present for dad.
Screen mirror. A transparent film that produces a high quality mirror when your phone is off. Verdict – Brilliant. While appearing to be deep in a texting conversation, you’re actually admiring your reflection!
Mopod. Loveable character that detects incoming phone call and does an informative jiggle. Verdict – Not only great fun but also massively irritating!
Curly Cord. Giant retro handset that sticks two fingers up to the modern day obsession with small phones. Verdict – daft.
Waterproof case. Stylish PVC jacket for your mobile that lets you take calls in the bath! Verdict – Good, if you really want to do that.
Egg Mobile Phone Sensor Clock. Works in the same way as the Mopod, but for people who would prefer a dancing egg. Verdict – see above!
Dynamo Powered Mobile Phone Charger. Earn yourself precious seconds of extra talktime for the small price of looking like an idiot winding up your phone! Verdict – why would you think to take it, and not your charger?
Snake Bite Joystick. Clip-on joystick for early Nokias that’ll boost your 
performance on “snake”. Verdict – Great, unless somebody sees you.
Mobile Phone Shaped calculator. A calculator that looks like a bit like a phone. But then really confuse people by buying a Sony P300, the mobile phone that looks like a calculator! Verdict – phones have calculators anyway.
Football dangle. Improve your phone’s aesthetic quality with the ugly oversized head of Wayne Rooney! Also available in John Terry. Verdict – cumbersome.
So there you have it. The definitive guide to what not to buy this Christmas!
5 Comments
Nick,
I am former head of programming at the BBC and I concur with Dave. My inflence remains strong. A contract has been written and is yours if you want it. Just pop round to Shepherd’s Bush.
Greg D
ps you also seem like an attractive young boy. do you like sushi?
Are you my mum? If not, thanks very much! No I haven’t consider comedy writing…yet.
Nick, I really like your writing style, have you ever considered writing comedy? Your blog is the highlight of my boring week at work.
A bluetooth dongle may not be exciting, but it is pretty essential for those of us who use mobiles for work, and need to keep our mobiles synch’d with our PC or Laptop scheduler, contacts, etc. I’d be perfectly happy to get a bluetooth dongle as a stocking filler present this Xmas.
That’s all great advice but my dad already has a SPMPCP (Small Pink Mobile Phone Charm Poodle).